a fringe covers everything

it's been an unusual past few days.
since thursday anthony's been apologetic and sweet, and pissed half the time too. on friday night i went for a meal with some girlfriends and anthony was going out with his friends for a lads night out.
i happened to go out after my meal, in the same area anthony was meant to. i didn't look for him though. instead, i stayed with joy and yvonne and eventually met up with beau.
i'm not sure, maybe it's becasue i'd only drank two bottles, but when i saw him i just thought to myself, 'why do i lower myself to that?'
i was standing in the corner by the cigarette machine, and he was by the bar. i saw him walk in, i always notice him first. i stood and watched him for a minute or two before he looked around and his eyes drifted over me. he caught sight of me and turned back to the bar. and then he turned around quickly and looked at me again. he walked towards me, bringing his drink with him.
he touched my new hair and said he barely recognised me. he was wearing the same old jeans with the same old shirt and the same old shoes. he stood out a mile to me.
he asked what happened with me and anthony, said he'd talked to my sister yesterday and heard the news. i told him it was barely news: we'd broken up; it wasn't the end of the world, i lied.
he looked at me the way he does when he's had a drink and it's coming up to closing time. he said i'd changed since the last time he'd seen me. new hair, new me i said. he told me it was more than that. maybe... i mumbled.
i'm so sick of having hidden-meaning conversations with beau. why the fuck can't we just come out and say what we're really thinking for once?
maybe the half a pill i'd taken earlier was kicking in, but for some reason i felt comfortable in my little corner by the cigarette machine, and beau was ruining it. i said i'd better get back to my friends, and he said similar. we looked at each other again and he told me that i'd never been as beautiful as i was at that moment.
i smiled and said his friends were waiting, and turned away from him. i didn't dare turn around again, but i felt him kiss my cheek from behind me.
i missed anthony.
i missed him so so much.