interflora day

as always, much had happened since i last wrote.

mumps sucks ass. seriously. i thought i was going to die last week.

friday 4th : went out with my 'older' friends yvonne and julie. got pissed. took speed. met my 'younger' friends noah, tanya and marissa. made an amazaing effort to be civil to people i once had a problem being civil to. saw so many people i hadn't seen in ages. like phil and michael, beau's friends. adam came to meet me in the club about five minutes before closing time. i said goodbye to my friends. me and adam bumped into beau. i introduced them to each other - which of course wasn't awkward at all. it was about 12 30 and the speed was well in circulation by this point. i made adam drive us to the beach, and we sat there for about two hours, me talking incessantly, him listening carefully. then we drove back to my house, and we didn't get into bed until 4am. but of course i didn't sleep. no sleep for the speedy.

on saturday morning i was a mess. and i was starting to get a lump between my jaw and my ear. this got worse and on sunday night i had to go to accident and emergency. mumps was diagnosed.

on monday morning my parents were at work. i was in bed, asleep, dreaming. someone woke me up, shaking me gently. it was anthony, holding his old key up.

surprised? me? no, no.
shocked.

i told him he couldn't come near me and because i was tired and shocked there was a lot of confusion. when i got round to telling him i had mumps he just laughed and gave me a cuddle. 'no wonder you look like shit'. after a while i got tired and said he should leave.

the next day i had to get the bus to the doctors to get some stronger painkillers. the journey there was bad enough. sitting in the waiting room was a nightmare. i looked like a freak with a massive balloon sticking out the side of my face, and i was freezing cold, temperatures all over the place, the pain in my stomach was terrible, and i was so, so tired. i texted anthony asking him to ring me. i couldn't bear the thought of getting on the bus again.

half an hour later, just coming out of the doctors surgery, he rings me. he's whispering, i barely understand him. 'have you got money?' 'yeah' 'then i can't hannah. i'm sorry. i'm with vicky' 'ok. bye' god, he cares so so much, right? i'm such a fucking idiot.

adam came round and brought me flowers that night. he made me smile. they were blue and almost made me cry.

on saturday morning i woke up to find 12 red roses had been delivered. adam again. how sweet he is.

later on i got a delivery. five huge red roses delivered by the interflora man. no card. no name. just adressed to me. couldn't be adam...

or maybe it was adam though. he could've sent them just to make me feel even more special. he seems like the kind of person who doesn't need gratitude to make someone feel good.