It’s just lunch now, had german, biology, chemistry and maths this morning, and I’ve got French and geography coursework to hand in this afternoon – that I’ve finished though.
I had a look at my friend’s diary this morning, and it made me kind of sad. He’d posted all the pictures of their visit to Lancaster uni, and it made me think about things. I don’t think i’ll ever have fun like that with them again.
The thing that kept our friendship so alive was the fact that we had nothing to be scared or afraid or shy of. Together, we could say, think, act like we wanted without giving a damn if anybody cared. Well, that’s what it felt like for me.
They’re the only real friends I think I’ve ever had. Maybe that’s why it feels so bad that we hardly ever speak or see each other. And I would pick up the phone this second if I could think of a single thing I could think of to say. I’ve been left out of the loop for such a long time.
I hope they’re all still in there, I suppose. Actually that’s a total lie. Why, if they can still have fun together, can’t I be included in any of it?
This all probably sounds immature, but I can’t help but miss the friendships I had with them all and be sad by the fact that I know they’ll never be same again.
(sigh), off to some French homework.
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